Moms Insisting on Licensed Tools
55 W. 125th Street
Harlem, NY 10027

What Does God Say?

Newsflash- Bible Supports M.I.L.T.

It has come to out attention that certain passages in the Bible remark about our Lord's disdain for tools, not once, but several times! This discovery certainly echoes our reservations and gives new purpose to our assault tool jihad.

Exodus 20:25 If you make an altar of stones for me, do not build it with dressed stones, for you will defile it if you use a tool on it.

Deuteronomy 27:5 Build there an altar to the LORD your God, an altar of stones. Do not use any iron tool upon them.

Biblical scholar Gary C. sent in this:

Jud 4:21 Then Jael Heber's wife took a nail of the tent, and took an hammer in her hand, and went softly unto him, and smote the nail into his temples, and fastened it into the ground: for he was fast asleep and weary. So he died.

Later, Biblical scholar Charles P. sent in this passage- note the sinister pattern developing here:

Jud 5:26 She put her hand to the nail, and her right hand to the workmen's hammer; and with the hammer she smote Sisera, she smote off his head, when she had pierced and stricken through his temples.

Jud 5:27 At her feet he bowed, he fell, he lay down: at her feet he bowed, he fell: where he bowed, there he fell down dead.

Just recently, Dr. Elizabeth Eral, a Ned Ludd Chair Professor of Theology,sent in the following passages that support our cause:

1 Kings 6:7
In building the temple, only blocks dressed at the quarry were used, and no hammer, chisel or any other iron tool was heard at the temple site while it was being built.

"It is patently clear," says Dr. Eral, "that God doesn't want tools used."

Exodus 32:4
He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, "These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt."

"You can see clearly that God was not just made at the Hebrews for making a false idol of a calf, but also for using TOOLS!!," continued Dr. Eral. "If you look at the comment 'they' made following the making of the idol, they state '...THESE are your gods...' Since that's the plural, it can only mean that the calf AND THE TOOL were the gods. No wonder God was mad. This one's not out of context either."

Jeremiah 10:3
For the customs of the peoples are worthless; they cut a tree out of the forest, and a craftsman shapes it with his chisel.

"Finally," says Dr. Eral, "this last passage has been regularly misinterpreted. When Jeremiah writes '...and a craftsman shapes it with his chisel," the 'it' refers to the worthless customs of the people, NOT the tree cut out of the forest, like most commentators believe. Not only that, but you can see how mean-spirited and hateful these people are because they're cutting down trees. I'll bet they voted for Bush, because only mean people voted for him...but I don't want to get political here."

M.I.L.T. thanks Doug and Hillary W. for having Dr. Eral contact us with this important information.